Reading this felt like a mirror gently shattering. It’s bold and unapologetic, like a friend shaking you awake from a dream you didn’t realise was a nightmare. The line about “turning anxiety into aesthetic”, thank you! It’s a call to action that feels both liberating and terrifying, but in the best way. The reminder that healing, not suffering, holds the power to define us is both humbling and empowering. This isn’t just advice, it’s an invitation to reclaim the pen and rewrite the story we’ve been passively living. Bravo for this masterpiece of tough love!!! Loved every word!
Helpful! Would love to see a follow up to this — how to realize whether you’re the one establishing the situationship? Using the assumption in the “In friendships” section that people also may have good intentions but are socialized to thinking a situation ship is acceptable/common, how do we acknowledge this framework and break out of it for the others’ benefit and our own? There’s too many situationships for everyone to be victims, maybe more ppl need to learn to acknowledge they may be adding to it
You’re absolutely right we can’t all be victims. I think it’s very important to look at the situation from the other side. I recently had been in a Situationship post break up and everyone including myself was very concerned about how this person is leading me on emotionally but I sat down with myself, had this difficult conversation and I realised I’m also using them as a crutch and I myself am contributing to this continuation of the situation so really you just need sit down think back and inspect what it is that you’re doing to contribute to the situationship. AND THEN do something about it. That’s the hardest part. It’s either you open up talk to his person tell them what your intentions are and ask them their intentions to see where you’re aligned or misaligned or break it off.
Great read, also applicable for post-breakup situations and relationships void of emotional connection.
“Your suffering doesn't make you special. Your healing might.” ‼️
Reading this felt like a mirror gently shattering. It’s bold and unapologetic, like a friend shaking you awake from a dream you didn’t realise was a nightmare. The line about “turning anxiety into aesthetic”, thank you! It’s a call to action that feels both liberating and terrifying, but in the best way. The reminder that healing, not suffering, holds the power to define us is both humbling and empowering. This isn’t just advice, it’s an invitation to reclaim the pen and rewrite the story we’ve been passively living. Bravo for this masterpiece of tough love!!! Loved every word!
I just might need to read this every morning, so I stay knowing my worth.
this rewired my brain omg. thank you for helping me take accountability
god this is just incredible i will be coming back to this thank you maal
So good Maalvika
holy fucking shit, this blew my mind. i needed this, thank you
I love you 😭
ugh u never miss
Helpful! Would love to see a follow up to this — how to realize whether you’re the one establishing the situationship? Using the assumption in the “In friendships” section that people also may have good intentions but are socialized to thinking a situation ship is acceptable/common, how do we acknowledge this framework and break out of it for the others’ benefit and our own? There’s too many situationships for everyone to be victims, maybe more ppl need to learn to acknowledge they may be adding to it
You’re absolutely right we can’t all be victims. I think it’s very important to look at the situation from the other side. I recently had been in a Situationship post break up and everyone including myself was very concerned about how this person is leading me on emotionally but I sat down with myself, had this difficult conversation and I realised I’m also using them as a crutch and I myself am contributing to this continuation of the situation so really you just need sit down think back and inspect what it is that you’re doing to contribute to the situationship. AND THEN do something about it. That’s the hardest part. It’s either you open up talk to his person tell them what your intentions are and ask them their intentions to see where you’re aligned or misaligned or break it off.
this is the least tough love i heard about situationships. thank u for the advice! 💌